I had sex in total silence – it only made things hotter

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Looking up at my boyfriend last week, I bit my lip as I tried to hold back a moan.

We were in the middle of sex and every thrust made me want to scream out in pleasure.

He knows exactly which buttons to push and boy, does he enjoy pushing them.

But there was a problem: We were not alone in the house.

A good friend of mine was sound asleep and gently snoring in the next room.

I hadn’t actually intended to have sex while my mate was visiting, in fact I’d consider it rude.

But my boyfriend and I have both been very busy with work as of late, and sex has taken a backseat.

So when he walked into our room that night in just a towel, I couldn’t resist.

What started out as an innocent make-out session soon turned into a full-blown shag fest.

And so, there I was – trying desperately not to wake my mate, who was none the wiser to our sexy activities.

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I hadn’t even considered the power of silent sex, but this was a different level of pleasure.

It’s not in my nature to be quiet but the fact that I couldn’t give in to my urges was only making the sex more intense.

When he noticed that I was approaching orgasm, he gently put his hand over my mouth in an effort to help.

I can’t quite describe why but this gesture sent a shiver down my spine. 

Moments later, my orgasm arrived, and it was unbelievable. 

And it got me thinking about how quieter sex doesn’t mean bad sex – in fact, it was quite the opposite. 

When I was younger, I made the mistake of thinking that being loud automatically meant things were going great in bed.  

To naïve, sexually inexperienced me, being noisy in the sack was a way to show my lovers just how much fun I was having. 

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Besides, every porn film I’d ever seen always included extremely noisy women.

At the time, I didn’t fully realise that these sounds were for the viewer, not the people having sex on screen.

I didn’t have any outright When Harry Met Sally loud faking moments myself, but I’ll admit, I certainly exaggerated from time to time. 

And it took me years to realise that silence can actually be a huge turn-on.

A few years ago, I was at a friend’s garden party, where I met Sam*.  

We were both single and had an instant connection. 

As the temperature dropped, the rest of the group went inside and knowingly left us to get more acquainted. This was our chance. 

Sam grabbed my hand and we snuck away to the other side of the garden, which was conveniently located away from any prying eyes.

Holding me against the wall with one hand, he let his other hand wander under my skirt. 

To me, silence during sex isn’t actually about volume, but control

Soon enough, I was panting against his shoulder.

‘Sssh, you have to stay quiet,’ he whispered, as I tried my best not to moan out loud.

Being forced to remain quiet was a sort of painful pleasure, but it only made the experience hotter.

Another time, I was in bed at home with my date, Henry*, when the phone rang. 

Not long into my conversation with a friend, I noticed a naughty look in Henry’s eyes.

As I gabbered on with the person on the other side of the line, he started kissing my neck.

My breath caught in my throat.

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This all happened in a matter of seconds and my brain needed a moment to catch up.

My friend was sharing juicy gossip but I was afraid to open my mouth, in case a moan came out.

‘Ehm, I’m sorry, I have to go… do something quickly. I’ll call you back in a bit,’ I uttered before tossing the phone aside.

The sex that followed was explosive.

To me, silence during sex isn’t actually about volume, but control. 

Rather, I am instinctively a pretty loud person so having to hold back or be quiet is a challenge – and I think that’s part of why I like it so much.

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The idea of getting caught is also a big turn-on and a fairly common fantasy for many people.

Though, I’ll admit; fooling around with someone while your mate is on the phone, or in a friend’s garden, is not considerate behaviour. I wouldn’t do it again and it’s not something I recommend you try, either.

But having silent sex on purpose can actually be a great way to spice things up.

For instance, I once teased a lover by telling him that if he made a peep while I was pleasuring him, I’d stop.

We both enjoyed this ‘game’ – I loved seeing his face contort as he tried to keep his expression neutral.

You could use toys to lower the volume as well; I once tried a ball gag but it wasn’t for me. 

Perhaps you’ll like it better than I did.

Just be careful and discuss boundaries first.

Or, if you’re usually quiet during sex, perhaps try something that isn’t your speed and be a little louder next time.

You might be surprised by how much difference noise – or the lack of it – can make in the bedroom.

And how much you enjoy it.

*Names have been changed

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk. 

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